A Proper Goodbye for the End of Time
by Leia1979
Summary: An alternate scene for the Doctor's farewell tour in "The End of Time." What if the Doctor had been able to get a glimpse of Rose's current life with his part-human self in the alternate universe? Follows "Getting Back to Impossible."


**Author's Note:** This takes place almost two years after my Rose Tyler and metacrisis Doctor story, "Getting Back to Impossible." That story needed to have a happy ending for my own sanity, but then I was bitten by a particularly angsty plot bunny one morning, and this was born. I'm so sorry.

While it's not necessary to read "Getting Back to Impossible" for this to make sense, it does contain major spoilers for that story.

* * *

The Doctor leaned heavily against the TARDIS console as exhaustion caused by radiation poisoning started to take over. He'd delivered Donna's wedding present to her mother and grandfather and made his final goodbyes to Wilf. There was just one more person he had to see before he regenerated, and she was the one person he couldn't see.

He considered his options. The only way to avoid crossing his own timeline would be to see her before she'd ever met him, and he'd need to be careful not to let her teenaged self see him. But that wasn't what he really wanted. He needed to know she was all right, that she was living a fantastic life in Pete's World with someone else who was and wasn't him.

Finding the energy and means to send a message like he'd done before would take too much time that he just didn't have left, and he didn't think he could make Rose suffer through Bad Wolf Bay a third time for him. But maybe there was another way. If his counterpart had been successful in growing a TARDIS of his own, then perhaps his TARDIS could connect with her counterpart.

Bolstered by the thought, the Doctor got a new burst of energy as he ran to the monitor and initiated a search. A ping alerted him to the result, and there it was. His wonderful, intelligent timeship had found a tiny crack that led to her progeny in the alternate universe. The crack was only large enough to get a signal through, but that was all he needed. He dialled in settings on the console, and soon enough he saw a huge garden with a green lawn spread out in front of him. A gazebo and an empty fountain broke up the monotony of grass that led up to a familiar mansion. He'd done it! This was undoubtedly the Tyler mansion, but where was the other TARDIS?

The back door of the house slid open to reveal a tall, thin man in a blue suit. If the suit weren't already a dead giveaway, the gravity defying hair would be. He was going to miss this hair when he changed. His other self stepped aside to let someone pass, and his breath caught when he spied a familiar blonde head.

Rose Tyler looked hardly any different than she had when he left her at Bad Wolf Bay. Blonde hair brushed her shoulders covered by the same blue leather jacket she'd worn then. As he watched her, he thought both of his hearts might have stopped for just a moment. He wanted nothing more than to run to her like he had on that deserted London street years before. But he couldn't. He couldn't run to her or hug her or do any of the things he wanted to. He was fairly certain she couldn't even see him.

He tried to squash the pang of jealousy he felt as he watched them join hands and cross the garden together. They were heading towards a pair of wooden sheds. Curious. Then the other Doctor pushed open the door of the shed on the left and followed Rose inside. He caught the smallest glimpse of a metal ramp past the door and realised exactly what the shed was—a TARDIS with a functioning chameleon circuit. He quickly adjusted the setting on his sonic screwdriver and pointed it at the console of his TARDIS. The image before him disappeared.

"No!" the Doctor cried, not done yet. He tried the sonic again and nothing changed. He stared wistfully in front of him before realising something: the coral in front of him wasn't the same colour as the coral behind him. It was slightly more pink. And the round things on the wall were actually circles rather than hexagons. The projection was still there; he was just seeing the inside of their very similar TARDIS.

The blue-suited Doctor stepped out of the hallway into the console room and appeared to look straight at him. He froze, still reasonably certain he wasn't visible but not as sure as he was before. He relaxed when the other Doctor's eyes swept past him around the console room.

"I know you're there," the other man said quietly. "Might as well make yourself visible."

Well, that answered that. He adjusted the setting on his sonic again and aimed it at his TARDIS' console. He could see in his counterpart's eyes when he appeared.

"Why are you here?" the other Doctor asked warily, still keeping his tone low.

He opened and closed his mouth wordlessly as he tried to figure out what to say. He doubted he'd get away with lying to himself, so he settled on the truth. "Farewell tour. I'm dying. My song is ending, if you want to put it in a more poetic Ood-like way." He tried to say it lightly but failed. "I just wanted to see her one last time."

His counterpart's expression softened. "I'm so sorry. How long has it been for you?"

"Since I left you here?" he clarified bluntly. "Twenty-two months and seventeen days. But you...you have a TARDIS. It's brilliant. How long did it take to grow?"

"Thanks to Donna, she's only forty-two years old." The other Doctor patted the console of his TARDIS that looked similar, though not identical, to his own.

"It's been forty-two years?" he sputtered. "But you haven't aged." He was horrified. His other self wouldn't regenerate, but he wasn't aging, either? Then his logical self caught up and pointed out that Rose didn't look a day over 25.

"No, it's been just over two years for us. The TARDIS just took a bit longer. How is Donna, by the way?" the other Doctor asked cautiously.

"She got married. She's happy. She just...can't remember."

He nodded solemnly, not surprised by the answer. "And Martha?"

"Oh, she's off defending the Earth. With Mickey Smith of all people," he said with a tinge of disbelief.

The other Doctor smiled. "Never thought I'd be so proud of Mickey the Idiot. Rose still misses him, you know."

"How is she, really?" he asked, both needing and dreading the answer.

"She's brilliant, of course," the other Doctor grinned madly. "Did you know she can communicate with the TARDIS? No, of course you didn't know. I didn't know."

"What?"

The other Doctor shoved his hands in his pockets and looked just a little smug. "Gift of the Time Vortex or the Bad Wolf or what have you. She's a low-level telepath now."

For some reason he wasn't nearly as shocked by this news as he should be. Leave it to Rose Tyler to do the impossible. "And how often do the two of them gang up on you?"

"Oh, all the time. The day Rose can pilot the TARDIS by herself, I'm doomed." He raised one blue-suited arm to run a hand through his hair. The Time Lord caught a glint of light with the movement and his eyes narrowed. The other Doctor froze as he registered what the full Time Lord was looking at and lifted his hand up so the silver-tone ring was visible. "Um, we got married."

He shouldn't have been surprised by that. Wasn't it what he wanted? For Rose to be happy with the part-human version of him? To have that domestic life that he couldn't? And yet he was sure the sudden tightness in his chest had nothing to do with the fact that he was dying.

"Congratulations," he said dully as he tried not to let his jealousy show. "She chose you."

The other Doctor's expression suddenly turned cold. "You didn't give her a choice. You knew exactly what you were doing. Do you know how angry she was with you for leaving her behind? How much you hurt her?"

"I…" he started and stopped. Of course he knew, and the guilt had gnawed at him for nearly two years, but he did what he'd had to. "It was to keep her safe."

The other man visibly bristled. "You can't lie to me. I used to _be_ you. Yes, it was partly to keep her safe, but Rose trapped in a parallel universe will always be healthy, young, and beautiful to you. She'll never age, never die." He was close to shouting now. "How convenient was it that I came along? You just tell yourself she left you for someone else so you can continue being the lonely god." He paused in his tirade and closed his eyes. "She loves you and always will."

He was taken aback by the other Doctor's outburst. Had he completely mucked things up by leaving them here? "Aren't you happy together?"

"Of course we are, but it wasn't always easy with you hanging over our heads. The first couple months here were...difficult. I don't need you upsetting my wife again."

He flinched at the word "wife," knowing his other self used the term deliberately to make a point. His very existence made their lives complicated. "So I guess you aren't planning to tell her about this little visit."

The other Doctor sighed. "As much as that would make things simpler, that's where you and I are different. I can't keep this from her. But I will ask you one thing. Don't tell her you're dying. Rose would tear time itself apart to save you, and I can't lose her."

"What?" he squeaked. Don't tell her? He hadn't planned to speak to Rose at all, just like he hadn't actually spoken to most of his other former companions on this final tour of his. He just wanted a brief peek at her life to assure himself he'd done the right thing leaving her here with her family and his part-human duplicate, to know she was better off by having met him than not. Of course, he hadn't planned on this rather complex conversation with his other self, either. He felt a brief spike of panic as he heard footsteps coming down the hallway towards the console room.

"Doctor?" a familiar voice called, and his hearts started to beat faster. He never thought he'd get to hear her say that again, and he blinked a few times as he watched her approach. He was partially hidden from her view by the other Doctor, and she hadn't yet noticed him. "The TARDIS insisted you were somewhere in the wardrobe, not that I know why you'd be there. I don't know what she was think—" Rose trailed off as she saw double. She looked from her Doctor in blue to the identical man in brown pinstripes. She only knew which one was her husband because she knew what he was wearing. And maybe also because the man in brown was staring at her as if he'd never expected to see her again, which she supposed he hadn't.

Rose took a step closer to the Doctor in brown. "Are you?" she asked, reaching a hand out towards him.

"Just an image," he said with a hint of sadness. "A projection from one TARDIS to another."

"Is something wrong?" Rose asked, unconsciously reaching her hand out to grasp her husband's.

"Oh no, nothing at all," the Doctor lied. The pain and exhaustion were starting to come back, but he willed every cell of his superior Time Lord physiology to hide it from her. "Just a happy accident, really. My TARDIS found yours, and here we are. Like stopping by for tea. How are you, Rose?"

"I'm good." She looked up at the man next to her who squeezed her hand in return. "We're good. Got our own TARDIS now. Well, obviously you figured that part out. Finally went to Barcelona. Saw the dogs with no noses."

He nodded, feeling disappointed he'd never had the chance to take her there. "And how did they smell?"

"Terrible." Rose smiled softly. "Let's see, got thrown in jail, escaped, and then saved the noseless dogs from being dognapped. Not bad for our first trip in this TARDIS."

"Seems like not much has changed," he replied, sounding more wistful than he'd intended.

Rose looked down at the floor for a minute before returning her eyes to his. "You missed the wedding."

"My invitation must have gotten lost," he replied with as much of a smile as he could muster. "Are you happy, Rose Tyler?"

She nodded firmly but silently, her eyes starting to glisten with unshed tears. "I miss you."

"Oh, Rose, I miss you. So very much." He stifled a grimace as the pain began to worsen. He had to go before she could see something was wrong. "I'm afraid I have to go now. And in case we don't have another chance to catch up, have a fantastic life. Both of you." His eyes travelled from Rose to his counterpart, who had put an arm around his wife's waist to hold her close. The Doctor raised his hand to cut the transmission but paused in a moment of indecision.

"I'm sorry I never said it when I should have, but—" His eyes cut to the other Doctor, who gave a brief if slightly reluctant nod. "I love you, Rose Tyler. Goodbye." Before he could change his mind again, he flicked his sonic screwdriver towards the console and ended the communication. The projection of his other self and Rose faded away, but the image of Rose's gentle smile as a tear rolled down her cheek was permanently burned into his memory.

His other self was right—he should have given Rose a choice back on that beach in Norway. There were a lot of things he should have done differently, but Time Lord or not, it was too late now to change them. He grunted in agony and fell to his knees on the metal grating beside the console. A golden glow emanating from his hands told him regeneration was coming all too soon, whether he was ready or not. And he wasn't ready to go, not at all. But he consoled himself with the thought that no matter what came next, no matter how much he wished had been different, Sarah Jane, Jack, Martha, and Donna were out there, living their lives. And the girl who was supposed to be just a travelling companion, whom he'd fallen in love with against his better judgment, Rose Tyler was happy.


End file.
